Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
