Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
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