I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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