I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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