Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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