Betty ford says i'm here all night
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Everyone says I win the strip club
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Randomize
