shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
