Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
