I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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