nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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