no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
