i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Do you have feelings for this penis?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
