they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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