So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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