Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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