that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
