and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize