so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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