awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
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