yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
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