He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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