i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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