I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
