Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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