one might say we're banned from that church
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
please don't ironically join a cult
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