You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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