His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Found your dick twin last night
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
