she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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