it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
