It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize
