should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
where are my eyebrows?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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