He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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