I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
