My friends, they love my intelligence
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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