come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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