My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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