Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
