I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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