He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
