You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
