I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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