I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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