i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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