you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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