It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
