I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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