Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
