How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
