she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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