adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize