I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
